A Running Horror Story

WARNING: This material that you are about to read is hilarious and disgusting. If you do NOT like poop talk or are a bit squeamish I would advice to stop reading now.



I thought I would launch off the first week of Autumn with a horror story. Muuuahahhaa

 I am 11 weeks out from my first full marathon, and training is beginning to really pick up. I put off my long weekend run until Sunday evening- 9 miles. I generally run in the morning but better late than never.

I ate dinner roughly around 5:00 p.m., then I went and sat down with a "little" ice-cream cone. It was a delish cookies and cream on a waffle cone. Not a big deal. I put on my running clothes and sat on the couch to "settle my belly" until 6:30 p.m.

OHHHH DAT ICECREAM

These aren't my pics but exactly what I ate.

Spicy Chicken Stew

I don't recommend any of what I ate before you run. Ever short or long run. Don't do it.

I was dragging my feet out the door. The first 5.5 miles were just average. I wasn't going to win a award or anything I was hitting about a 12 min pace. I consider that good since I spent the whole morning at the beach with the fam bam.

Mile 6: I spotted my pal Jenise outside of her house. I began yelling out her name and asking for water. I stopped and talked for a few mins and briefly mentioned that I felt like I needed to poo- no biggie... right? I drank her ice cold water and headed back on my merry way. Only 3 miles to go. I felt pretty good I was jammin to my music and just strolling along.

Mile 7: I started getting a rumble, and I was scared. I knew there were 0 bathrooms on the way back. I HAD TO MAKE IT HOME. I clenched my  cheeks and pushed on.

Mile 8: The voice in my head- No biggie. Just a mile left, mostly up hill but still just a mile.  I will not shit my self. I repeat WILL NOT drop a stinky bomb in my nike shorts.

Mile 8.7: I slow down to a slow walk. My stomach was in such distress it was making me feel hotter. I am sure even if I wasn't running I would be sweating at this point from how much work it was just to keep it in.

Mile 8.94: I finally reached my house, I was so close to hitting the 9 mile mark but I needed to stop. I HAD TO STOP. I ran up to my house to open the front door.

LOCKED.

 I grab out my phone while walking to the back and called the husband. To my disappointment it went STRAIGHT to Voicemail. (You have got to be kidding me, what if I was being murdered?!) Then I tried out the back door. BIG SURPRISE. LOCKED

I OFFICIALLY ENTERED PANIC MODE and start banging on the windows and door.

Ohhhhh. Dear LORD please have mercy on me.

DISASTER STRIKES

I shamefully pulled down my pants and braced my self with the fence and just let it go.

It can't get any worse than this. Right?

Wrong. I was in the eye of the storm.

The porch light turns on and my husband is peering at me through the kitchen window. I was like a monkey in the zoo. I could have just died from the embarrassment.

He actually asked me what I was doing. I am not sure if it was a serious question because you could smell me from a mile away. Between the sweat, stench, tears and shame I managed to yell out some profanities and my favorite:"Luke you're a dead man."

Ohhh what the neighbors must think of us. Sorry neighbors. It was an emergency.

I managed to gather my self and go in side to clean up and apologize. We agreed upon a couple of things.

1. I shall never again eat spicy chicken stew with a ice-cream cone before I run.
2. He will never again lock me out on a long run.

I feel like this was a great learning experience for me and hope it never happens again. Ever again. I also hope that it helps other people make better food choices before a run.

If you have any funny or embarrassing stories I would love to here them in the comments below.

All About Me....

Welcome to my amazing blog of randomness. 

Proud Submarine Wife!

I believe my life is like a project that is never completely finished. Each day I strive to be a better mother, wife, and friend than I was the day before the day before. I want to share my experiences with you all in hopes that I can encourage or inspire someone out there.

Right now the main focus of my blog is me trying to live a healthy lifestyle. I am currently on a break from running long distance and am focusing on lifting at the gym. I am going to transform my body over the next year. You  just watch, wait, and see.

You can always contact me at ldholcombe@yahoo.com

Darcy

Races-

Rock N Roll Seattle 1/2 Marathon June 2014

Boca Hawaii -Norman Tamanaha 15K, August 24, 2014

Rememberance Run September 6, 2014

Runner’s Hi 20K, September 7, 2014

Hokulani Bake Shop 25K, October 5, 2014

HMSA 30K, October 26, 2014

Mizuno - Val Nolasco 1/2 Marathon, November 16, 2014

Honolulu Marathon December 14th, 2014

Great Aloha Run 2015

Two Awesome Races in One Weekend

I started my weekend out with one life changing event- The Fisher House Remembrance Run 8k. I don't even think that I could begin to describe how powerful this event was. This wasn't your typical run of the mill military race, it was extremely moving. The emotions that began to wash over my body as we entered Ford Island are indescribable. I knew what the race was all about before I signed up, I knew that they had set up a display of boots with pictures of fallen heroes on them along the path. What I didn't know is how I would react seeing it all in person, it was a lot to grasp. My husband and I were talking about it as we drove in to park, I couldn't fight back the tears. I was taken back by how much work had gone into setting it all up, and by the fact that they are all volunteers. I was trying to wrap my head around the thought all of the people who are impacted by these men and women that were gone. I felt heart broken, and proud that we could all come together and honor their lives.

First race we both ran together!

Lucy wasn't happy, she slept the rest of the time.

We met up with the group I recently started running with- Stroller Warriors Pearl Harbor. They are really awesome and they had a HUGE group there. They were able to raise money for the run and gave it on stage at the race. I honestly can't imagine doing another race with out this awesome group of ladies. They seriously encourage and help you push through until you finish the race. I am so grateful that I found them and get to be a part of the group.

During the actual race I was able to run, and walk with a few different people. I saw several people drop to their knees as they found who they were looking for, it hurt to watch them. The amount of love that I felt there was unbelievable.

 I held it together pretty well and made it to the finish at 56 mins.

I didn't take pictures during the race itself, so I am borrowing a few from friends. I am so thankful that I was able to be a part of this event. I look forward to next year, and plan on being a bigger part of it.

WAIT WE AREN'T DONE:::

I did another race I did the Runners HI 20k that is part of the 808 readiness series. This race was awesome in its own way.

Luke and I before the race.

First off its a smaller race. So its not crowded which I like. Second off its nearly 12.5 miles and thats pretty rad. I met up with one my friends from Stroller Warriors Amy and her husband Spencer right before it started and took a couple of pictures. 

I started this race as usual, in the very back. I don't like to feel like I am going to get stepped on.

Amy and I

With in the first 1/2 mile I met Sarah, I ended up running with her for the next 8.5 miles.    

  Having someone to run next to and chat with can be a life saver, in this case it was. I enjoyed myself and may have sang out loud to a Sublime song. Luke and Lucy found me a few times on the course, every time I saw them I was filled with love and encouragement. Having them at my my races always makes me want to push harder. I love them to bits.

 Sarah and I split up right around mile 9, because I really wanted to walk. I ended up walking then running a little for the rest of the race. Around mile 11 Luke and Lucy were there to tell me that I had just a little ways to go (1.5 miles), which to me felt like an eternity. At mile 12 I spotted Sarah again, she came back for me! Her coming back gave me a boost to finish in a "run". I am sure it was the slowest run anyone has ever seen but I did it. I felt relief as soon as I spotted her and I am so grateful that she did that for me. I finished at 2:37 and felt really good about it.

I look forward to the rest of the readiness series and can't wait to do my first marathon!

Thank you for taking the time to read!

-Darcy

Awesome New Shirt!