Why we decided to wait...

With Infant & Pregnancy Loss Awareness Day right around the corner I figured I would write about something that has been weighing heavy on my heart.



The burning question of my life lately is,"When are you going to try for another baby?"


 For those of you who don't know this we lost a pregnancy on Mothers Day of this year, and it was really was emotionally devastating for our family. I had such a hard time handling the loss, we decided it would be best to wait and try again. After talking it over we decided that after the original due date, which was December 25th would be best.

I think of it as starting fresh. The old due date will be past and it will be a whole new try. No reminders from friends ( I have 4 friends on my Facebook who are due with in two weeks of my original date). I feel like or decision is what is healthiest and the best for us.

Sometimes I feel like I am expected to be over it, but guess what- I'm not. For those like me who miscarry (a term used to describe the loss of a baby before week 20), the pain can be easily dismissed by onlookers. "oh, you can try again,"you have a long life to live,"another baby will come along,"get over it, move on and try again," you may be surprised but I have heard it all.

I know that plenty of time has past. I know that 1 in 4 pregnancies end in a loss. I know that I am not alone. I know that it wasn't my fault, and that there was nothing that I could have done to prevent it. If I could snap my fingers and make it better I would, but I can't. My heart still hurts, and thats where I am at right now.




"When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn't a word to describe them."- President Ronald Reagan. 

My daughter Lucy was so excited. 

If you have a friend who is going through a loss. Listen to them. Be there for them. Don't judge them for how they handle a loss, and defiantly don't press them to try again.

On October 15th please say a prayer and light a candle for those who have had a infant or pregnancy loss. Too many families grieve in silence.

“If everyone lights a candle at 7 p.m. and keeps it burning for at least one hour, there will be a continuous WAVE OF LIGHT over the entire world on October 15th.” (October15th.com)

We will never forget.

Darcy